The Eyes of the Beholder

As many of you know, I am a former Royal Pain and retired roller derby girl for Dead Girl Derby. I never thought that it would be this hard for me to let go of something, but it is. When I skated my last game with my team and with the league in August, I honestly thought it was for the best and that I was ready to start my new journey. However, little did I know that I wouldn't be able to resist the temptation to follow, support, and even go to every game, and to question if I did the right thing or not.

When August ended and Dead Girl was beginning the new season, I knew my time was coming to an end. I would not be part of the forums or the groups, and would become the spectator. That if I truly wanted to stay in contact, I would have to follow every bit of information that was available to me. As soon as that time came where I was "left in the dust," I began the journey as a former roller girl.

Facebook became my tool for information. I became a addict for information. I stalked everyone's page, wanting news of how recruitment was going, who was being drafted to which team, when the next event was going to take place, just so I could feel part of it, to be involved in the only way I knew how. I was lucky to run across a Facebook page, KC Derby Digest, that gave me a perspective that I would soon find myself in. From August to February, time went very fast, it seems. I anticipated the time just like the rest of them, felt the itch,to go to the game. It was going to be different for me though, as I would not be out there skating with them.

When tickets were announced for the season, I was gung-ho about getting season passes. Unfortunately, with my limited income and having to take care of responsibilities first, I missed the boat on those. Season tickets sold out! I was so sad but happy at the same time because I knew how great that was for Dead Girl Derby. My next option, knowing that the first game was arriving in February, was to get Game 1 tickets. I immediately got my ticket as soon as I could get it, and prepared myself for the game.

Game 1, Night of the Loving Dead III: Only Fools Fall and Shove was a hit! I arrived at 4 p.m. in my Royal Pain jersey, knowing how long the lines would get; that if I wanted the best seat in the house, I needed to arrive early. When the doors opened, I felt the rush and the excitement but I also felt a hole inside of me. I knew that this time I would be sitting on the sidelines, not as an injured skater or as a coach, but just a normal, ordinary person, coming to watch her favorite sport. I knew that I would not be putting on my skates or equipment, doing warm-ups, participating in the opening ceremony, or be out there where all the gore and glory would be taking place. I was going to be there as the biggest super fan of the Royal Pains. I tried to say it was okay, but in all reality, it wasn't and still isn't.

The Royal Pains took the floor as a whole new team and I couldn't have been prouder. They went up against the Shotgun Sheilas and our former captain, Dir-T Diana, that night. It was very hard for me to not want to support both; and in the end I did support both teams, or I supported the Royal Pains but supported my captain Dir-T Diana. I saw such an improvement with the fresh meat of last year and even improvement with the fresh meat of this season. I saw a whole new team at a whole new level that I never got to be a part of. I had difficulty following the game, to be quite honest. With DGD now under new rules, I have a lot to read up on. The game seems smoother and quite a bit more fair. However, I also saw that some things don't change. But hopefully, that was just because it was the first game of the season and everyone was nervous and wanted things to be perfect. I also liked the scores were higher up in numbers and not such a huge difference between the loss. Yes, my Royal Pains lost in points, but I think they won the hearts of  many that night. If you'd like to read up more on this, please go over to KC Derby Digest, the writer over there, did a fantastic job on the article covering that night.

I know that some of my Royal Pains were disappointed that night. Well, we can only be stronger by defeat. And I know that each and every one of those ladies put up a good fight and give just as much as taken. That is why I'm so excited for the upcoming game, Shamrock Showdown, that is taking place on Sunday, March 11, at River Roll. My Royal Pains are up against the Deadly Sirens, who of course drafted my co-captain of last year, Poison Evie. Poison is one heck of a point scorer, but the Royal Pains have some pretty fast jammers and pivots this year that I think this game is going to be interesting. Dixie Danger and Jackie Ow are strong team leaders; Imma B Sneaky and Squid Vicious are phenomenal coaches, and the team camaraderie of the Royal Pains is unstoppable. I'm excited to see them hit those blue to the ground, pass those stars and stripes rapidly, and make the game theirs!  This time around, I will be sporting my blue and purple, but deep down, my heart is bruised. I plan on arriving early as before, getting a different seat from a different angle, and I will definitely be reading the new rule set to understand some of things I didn't get in the last game, and really try to follow the points

If you haven't gotten your tickets for this next game, do so NOW! There are 150 tickets left, maybe less, after I have written this, and I don't think anyone should miss out this game! Go to http://www.brownpapertickets.com/event/217748 or to deadgirlderby.com to get yours today!

Good luck to you ladies. I will be a spectator once more and for every game, but know that every time, this girl wants to be on her skates.